I have travelled extensively during my short existance and i can safely say i have never been anywhere as foul in my life .
Lets begin with the town itself. It can be most generously be described using the words ” concrete” and “abortion”. As pointed out in the ’emel gazzette , the **** population should be happy to live there as it has wonderful facilities such as Harry’s bar where you can observe junkies stick needles into themselves and ****** **** each other with pool cues. Sounds wonderful already huh? It gets better.
As for the green spaces the silly gazzette bint sings about. Well there is the wonderful gadebridge park , who’s toilets are a famous meeting place for gentlemen of a certain persuasion , oh, lots of people get robbed there too. Another lovely green space is the aptly named “water gardens” . This is funny because it is made out of concrete too like everything else in this town. However wildlife flourishes in the water gardens, last week i saw **** feasting on a dead duck , shame it was not a dead ****.
Finally the town ****’s themselves, basically the whole population . The town is like night of the living dead with pregnant teenagers or girls with baby chavlings. Babies are the ultimate **** accessory , they’re free , they get ***** cash and ***** can fit stolen goods in their buggies. If you are a **** and you would like a baby then go to leisure world and ask one of the door staff, they will be happy to do the job for you, especially if you are under 15. **** men are equally contemptable, it is policy to refuse entry to pubs in ’emel if you are not wearing a ben sherman shirt and at least 6 pieces of fake gold jewelery more than your girlfriend.
There is no justification for this town or the majority of its population