Deal, less ****-******** than most

Deal is holding out bravely but not exempt from the breed. The Strand, a disco-pub, is their chief temple and the Deck their main night haunt now that the truly terrifying Alby’s has closed.

But there are enclaves where they can be avoided. Try The Admiral Penn, The King’s Head, and Rivals, an over-30s club which unofficially admits under-30s if they don’t look ******.

While Kent, the county that spawned the ****, is on a doomed mission to turn itself into an imitation of Essex, there are enclaves which by their relative remoteness have been shielded from the worst *********** of chavdom.

How grim is your Postcode?

Living in Dover, I feel pretty hard done by. ***** are just one of this wretched town’s many problems. I just feel grateful that I don’t live in Thanet, Sheppey or Kent’s **** grand central, the sprawling mightmare that is Ashford.

I find solace in escaping up the coast to Deal, which due to its large elderly population and its remoteness (2 hours from London by train, 1h45m by car) has resisited the **** onsluaght better than most.

***** have had a harder time establishing hegemony in this relatively safe and sleepy town with a good number of decent pubs and nice restaurants.

As the floodwaters of chavdom steadily rise, count on Deal to be an island which resits the inundation longer than most.