Dawlish used to be a sleepy little town, lots of ducks and fetes. Some arseholes obviously, every town has their fair (or unfair) share. Something terrible has happened … there has been a mass exodus from places such as Coventry and Newcastle. The pubs are full of ****, the ducks get kicked by **** and the fetes are littered with fake burberry.
‘Suped up’ ****-mobiles race round and round the one way system, always going slightly too fast to get a good aim with my sawn-off! None of the little bastards have insurance either.
The wildlife have moved on – not able to live alongside the clanging of extra large ***** ****** earrings and the ten inch thick ‘maens’ belchers.
These northern **** monkeys have even influenced the locals … there are ponchos everywhere and more and more residents are getting sky so they can use biduptv.
PLEASE HELP THE CITIZENS OF DAWLISH!