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I lost my virginity in McDonnalds in Croydon one saturday afternoon when I was about 13. Now I’m on TV almost every day, so it didn’t do me no harm.

When I was a lad there were only 2 McDonnalds in Croydon. These days there’s about 5. If that’s not political correctness gone mad I don’t know what is.







Top 10 worst places to live in England 2018