Written by Anonymous Visitor and posted in North West

Clayton………..Clayton………….Clayton, i cant believe the overpopulation of townies(chavs) in this stupidassed place. I know what your thinking, “thats what all these towns say”, all the other towns were greatly mistaken. Clayton is the heaven for townies. The nearby townie flooded area of Accrington is like living in the place where townies sleep…whereas Clayton is the place where they bother to get on the ever popular hyndburn circular or “bus” to the rest of us. They flock in at around 10:00am surrounding any “goffs”/”moshaz” and, to put it bluntly…beating the f*****g s**t out of them. Other pass time activities include:

1.Smashing phoneboxes
2.Smashing random windows
3.Taunting old ladies
4.Mugging old ladies
5.Consequently getting beaten with a handbag by old lady
6.Running away from old lady
7.Gaining townie point from doing this
8.Saying “Eeeyaaa meyte, can ya go an buy uz sum fagz mayte” or…
9.”Eeeyaaa meyte, can ya go an buy uz sum cider mayte”. Always answered with a no.
10.Trying to steal little kids bike
11.Walk around in 50man patronising groups
12.Attempt to steal anything at all
13.Get sent to prison for a while (10 points)
14.Go to prison again(15 points)
15.Back to no.1…complete the cycle until all goths/moshers are dead.

by Dale