Chelmsford

East AngliaEssex

People have described chelmsford quite well in other posts, but i thought i’d share what happened to me a while back.

I was happily walking to work minding my own business, trying not to get my suit wet in the rain when i heard a noise like 4 tractors having a gangbang. I turned my head and realised my mistake, i was staring eye to eye with a rabid vauxhall nova driver a little way down the road. I knew that making eye contact with a carfull of chavs was a bad idea when i saw the car swerve predictably to hit a puddle, which i really didnt need in my nice suit. I leapt out of the way and avoided being splashed, and as i was patting myself on the back for being so quick i heard a massive crunch. The nova had slid wildly in the puddle (probably due to the obligitory bald tires), and had smacked the kerb. the front left wheel was hanging loose (like their parents amphetamine ridden teeth), and the whole front left of the car looked a state. This was more than enough to make me crack up when the best thing i ever saw happened. A young chav mother pushing her kids hadnt been so quick to avoid the splash, and she actually ran to the drivers side, opened the door, pulled the driver out and hit him so hard he dropped straight away. She then proceeded to kick him while he was down for about 10 seconds (thats a long time to be repeatedly kicked in the head and groin) until herself being pulled off by a shop security guard. I continued happily in my un-wet suit and arrived at work on time (although no-one believed what i had just witnessed)







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