**** Safari – the solution to all our problems!

Not exactly a review of a town, more like a solution by CREATING a
place to populate with ***** simply for the purpose of A) eliminating
the problem from elsewhere and B) making it fun for normal people to go
visit the little *****!

My mate Ric came up with THE way to clear all ***** from our shores!!!

them on some remote island (not exactly LOST, more Jurassic Park) and
stick some sort of top end sports car like a Lamborghini or a Bugatti
Veyron or something on the top of a mountain, something where they can
all see it, but can’t get to it! (just to really mess with their heads)

How grim is your Postcode?

then you charge people for safari holidays where you all ride around on
elephants and bag a ****! You could have fishing contests where where
you bag the biggest (and thickest) **** and win a cash prize! Anyone
picking up Michael Carroll would immediately win his cash! (all two
pennies he’s got left!)

Since you’d be able to replenish the
island population with nature’s survival technique for all ***** by the
fact that they’d probably replicate faster than you could bag
them all, then he came up with the “euthanasia” method – **** Clubbing!
Kind of like seal clubbing, only with *****, you bag ’em up and whack
’em up!

I’m sure somewhere in the wonders of our technology, we’d be able to
use their remains as some sort of new replacement for fossil fuel by
sticking the bodies in a furnace! This could then be flogged off to
something like United Utilities as a renewable energy source to invest

it’s a bit harsh, but this was decided on the walk home after a night
of beer! I think the inspiration came from us being drunk and walking
past the Halfords at 2am to see 6 of them in Corsas all kitted up! One
word of advice kids, NEVER put a skirt on a Corsa – you’re committing
the “mutton dressed as lamb” sin for cars!!

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