Chatham – I wont miss you

KentSouth East

I lived near Chatham for one and a half years, in nearby Rochester. Not in the posher part of Rochester though, and having to do my shopping in Chatham I became familiar with the folk down there. I’m quite pleased Chatham has been earmarked as the birth place of ****, I’d begun to think I was a snob or intolerent. But the fact is they are a lower form of life. I remember coming home from a night shift and deciding to go out and do the shopping before going to bed. As I passed the hordes of ***** and **** mothers (ages 13-60), I became increasingly pissed off. I began to question my life and how low I had slipped to be living near and shopping in a town with such neanderthal types. The 13 year old girls with their sprogs, the overweight greasy haired mothers with cigarette butts wedged in their mouths, yet still managing to tell their kids to “Shut your fahkin’ maaths ‘fore I belt the lot of ya”. The tracksuit wearing muppets with obligatory gold earing, burberry cap, skinned heads and bad skin. Bad skin? What do you expect you dumb *****, all you eat is McDonalds and breakfasts at the local greasy spoon. The sun was beginning to give me a headache as I had to squint at these bat-faced morons. When I got home I told myself not to be so intolerant of other people, for I was unaware that these people were not the norm in this country. You see, I am a foreigner and I had assumed that this is generally what poor English people were like, and it was getting on my ****. But now I know that other English people hate them too. And having moved to another town, I am happy to confirm that they are, thank Chr_st, not the norm. We can only hope that this lower link in the food chain dies out, but what with Child Benefits and Oxfam shops, it is quite easy to support a family of ten and still have money left over for White Lightning. Where to from here? Well I foresee a big showdown in Chatham between the Kosovans and the *****, leaving the Poles to swarm in and take advantage of the low rent and charity shops. Well at least theyre clean, and you can understand their English better. Get in there my san.

Top 10 worst places to live in England 2020