Chatham Chatham! Chavham as it is proudly called by its alternative community. Just walk down the high street from the Gala bingo where the single mums crowd on a Saturday night to spend their newly cashed benefit cheques, you will pass almost 30 different fast food places from the major league artery cloggers such as […]
Category: Kent
The worst places to live in Kent
Gravesend
If kent is the garden of england then GRAVESEND must b the manure they used as fertiliser! everywhere u turn is full of *****, with their **** babies & their air of ********* pollutes the town. Gravesend ***** are pretty standard – trackie bottoms, bright white trainers (or occasionally expensive Nike Shox nicked frm the […]
Maidstone: blindin’!!!! shore ’nuff then, belieeeeve me!
so Maidstone then… what a FUCKHOLE!!!!! the only good thing about growing up in Maidstone was that filthy Chatham was just up the road, making us feel superior. the only good thing about that was the rare occasion when all the bonehead lee cooper jeans luminous shirt wearing reebok cuntrags would vacate the town centre […]
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Medway – A natural history of the ****
Medway, situated between London and Canterbury, is possibly one of the worst ******** areas of ***** i have ever seen. Sunderland was pretty bad, London isn’t that much better but for dizzying heights of fake gold and burberry then Medway is hard to ****. It’s full of mindless sheep, grazing off society’s hard earned taxes. […]
Dover – ******** of England
Let us for a moment imagine that the British Isles are the silhouette of an old man. Scotland is his cap, Cornwall his toes, Anglia his curved spine making Dover his herpes ******** ****-hole. When questioned, most people will remark that they have been through Dover but never stopped off “daaaaaaaaahn taaaaaaahn,” as the city centre is known […]
The return of the Sunday Market brings the **** to New Ash Green
New Ash Green a modern village on the outskirts of Gravesend, Dartford and Sevenoaks. Built in the 1960′ – 1970’s it was once an area for bringing up children in a green and woodland area with out cars near to the houses. Not any more, these children have now had kids of their own and […]
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Erith, Rewritten
Erith is one of the remaining pockets of former council estate homes in Bexley. Ithas traditionally been a dumping ground for former residents of the local mental hospital, single mothers, care leavers and those with a history of anti-social behaviour, such as alcoholism and drug abuse. Many who live in Erith are there because they […]
Gillingham – Starburger- The Ivy of **** Culture
I have to admit, I have been in Starburger and associated Chavey Cafe`s a few times, but only on a United Nations Cack Finding Mission.I will now proceed to discuss a few of the quaint English customs, first of which is ordering and seating.It is customary for a lady diner to be accompanied by her […]
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Gillingham, Kent
I think I should talk next about something I couldn’t believe, no it wasn’t hope, but shopping.I live in a town, that is twinned by the local council with the Underworld.I was thinking the other day, not a common recreation in Gillingham, where I was pondering and daydreaming on the great shopping metroplexes of the […]
Sittingbourne, ***** and ******* living in (dis)harmony
Ah Sittingbourne, the place with the 2nd highest teenage pregnancy rate in the country (narrowly beaten by Sheppey there) Not a lot has changed since I last wrote about the s******e, but I just want to follow up my comments, and correct a few others. I’ve noticed that most visitors to the town seem to […]
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Dirtford (Dartford)
On Saturday night, ***** from all of Dirtford and surrounding areas congregated in Dartford Park to ‘distress/ terrorise’ the normal inhabitants of the land. These ***** were given away as trouble-makers by their terrible dress sense and the now-old concept of tucking the trackies into the socks. I myself am not a ****, but even […]
Chatham: Whats the probability?
A businessman gets of the train in **** capital Chatham. “Excuse me please,” he asks the nearest baseball hat wearing, shellsuit attired ****, “Is there B&Q in Chatham.” “Nah mate,” the **** replied, “but there’s 2 H’s.” This requires thought on 2 levels: First – whats the probability of the **** replying nicely? Second – […]
