United Kingdom - iLiveHere: Best & Worst UK Towns Reviewed

Otley, the town that is well known as grotley otley.

The town that is well known as grotley otley. It is pituresque, with cobbled roads and a beautiful riverside… are you wondering what’s so bad about it? It’s quite plain and simple, simple being the operative word in this, THE PEOPLE! I’m now under the conclusion that the people in this town were once experimented […]

Appledore, North Devon, is about as mystical as a pitbull’s ****

As a big Harry Potter fan, my husband and I were attracted to Appledore by its magical name. After living in this remote **** outpost for near on 4 years however, I can safely confirm that this North Devon realm is about as mystical as a pitbull’s **** which has merged with a KP Skips […]

Combe Martin is truly the most depressing, hopeless & generally futureless place

I can honestly say I’m proud to have come from Combe Martin, near Ilfracombe, North Devon. It is truly the most depressing, hopeless and generally futureless place on earth. I am proud because despite the fact that there are no good schools in the whole area and absolutely no examples of people who have come […]

Saltash: behind the smoke and mirrors lies a cruel, jealous, vindictive town

Living in or moving to Saltash, Cornwall

Saltash, on the face of it appears to be a middle class, family orientated town which welcomes visitors with open arms… But, behind the smoke lies a cruel, jealous, vindictive town, that can strip the few decent residents bare in seconds, should they ever show any level of decency in public. The shop owners reflect […]

Chard, the houses remind me of Cambridge… if it had been bombed

On my first visit to chard I was immediately struck by the sheer class of the place, it is a beautiful town with clean streets, and it gave the impression that it was the kind of place that only people of a social hierarchy could possibly afford to dwell in. The houses themselves reminded me […]

Farnworth used to be a nice place to live in the 60/70’s

Farnworth used to be a nice place to live in the 60/70’s. Good Community feel, nice neighbours, with a sense of belonging. Not any more. It has become a dumping ground for the dregs of society that no-one else wants or cares about. Orange single Mums, pushing several kids about, the whole Family in Pyjamas, […]

Nottingham? It should be called Shottingham.

I lived in Nottingham all my life before recently moving to London. I can safely say that Areas in Nottingham are literally a no go – on the same level as Afghanistan. Bilborough, Broxtowe, Basford and St Anns are just massive council estates filled with hooded ***** who openly carry weapons and drugs on them. […]

Sleezy old Letchworth. Dear oh dear!

Letchworth Garden City, Hertfordshire, Property Guide

Sleezy old Letchworth. Dear oh dear. I’ve lived in Letchworth for eight years now and what I’ve witnessed over the years is incredible. Head into town on a Friday night and find yourself staring at groups of the local teenagers who believe they’re high end drug dealers carrying knives down the front of their trousers. […]

Marlow, Full of smug yummy-mummies & the stockbrokers who keep them

Full of smug, self-satisfied yummy-mummies and the stockbrokers who keep them, alongside ancient crumblies who clog the pavements walking 3 astride at 1mph. On the weekend it acts as a haven for the High Wycombe catchment area, attracting aspirational lady diners and bar-goers in search of their very own stockbroker. Inevitably this attracts cynical gentlemen […]

A good number of men living in Burnley have had it with their sister

Worst GCSE results in Britain during 2012, one of the highest unemployment rates, ***** football team and high welfare activity. The town should be in Yorkshire; the people of Burnley speak and act like a Yorkshire folk, it borders Yorkshire and has no place in God’s county – Lancashire. Turf Moore A.K.A. **** Morgue looks […]

Downham Market: from ex-cons in the flats by the train tracks to the Retreat Estate

From the ex-cons living in the flats overlooking the train tracks, to the drug dens up the Retreat Estate, here in Downham (referred to by it’s Cockney and Essex population as Daaahhnum) we have many invaluable amenities. Come to the high street for a piss-poor selection of shopping destinations, from Peacocks to Savers – you […]

Ashford, I grew up here and I am mentally scarred

A town in South East England where the bling people wear is actually Argos, allegedly 4ct yellow-coated lead and the hoop earrings are so big that people’s ears look like those of the Yanomami Indians who stretch them for traditional purposes. I grew up here and am mentally scarred for life by the sheer amount […]