Bodmin – Home of the Cornish ****

When you think of Cornwall, you think of lovely scenery, cream teas and perhaps a place to retire to. It was once such a place.

Until the ***** appeared.

Every evening a convoy of **** cars going around a loop of the town. Bright purple novas and lucid green escorts aplenty, with the garage supplying a hideous array of body kits, underfloor lighting, and the largest spoilers known to mankind. Thats not to mention the car stereos with a bass so loud it rattles your windows and teeth when they race past.

How grim is your Postcode?

I thought that was bad enough. The fair came to town not too long ago, and this seems to drag their fat legginged arses off their sofas en mass to go dahhn and watch their ****** offspring risk death on the precuriously constructed rides, whilst shouting at another brat “Britney/Courtney/Levi….(please feel free to add your favourite **** brat name) get over ere naaahhh”

There are some choice pubs, especially for the 17yr old **** in search of some cheap nasty lager.

If you go to Cornwall on holiday, do not go here!!