As we have a baby we don’t get the opportunity to go into London centre very often and so have to make do with a wander around the local area at weekends. We are constantly amazed when we go into the shopping centre, it’s like something out of a Living Dead movie. Chavs wander around with gaunt, expressionless faces. The sound of children crying and chav Mums shouting is deafening. There is no Elizabeth Duke but there is an H Samuel where the more upmarket chav can buy their ‘Mum’ ring. Outside the doors of the shopping centre is where you find groups of women standing around their prams smoking fags and swearing loudly. They wear the usual scraped back hair, tracksuits and “what are you looking at?” expressions and have the amazing ability to smack their kids really hard whilst smoking a fag and eyeing up a new pair of shoes.
Perhaps because of it’s location the accent sounds exactly like the “am I bovered?” character and if you ever see the school kids on the bus you’ll realise just how easy it will be for them to follow in their mum’s footsteps and one day have a kid of their own to batter at the shops. All in all a thoroughly depressing little place. We’ve just bought our first place in Bromley as it seemed like a nice place but having read the notices on that area I’m starting to wonder if anywhere is safe from the chav. Some of the notices said that Bromley is boring but at least Bromley has two theatres and a relatively decent little high street, Bermondsey has a ten pin bowling alley (full of chavs), a cinema and the shopping centre of the damned. Can’t wait to escape.