Barnham

Well I have only been living here for roughly 3 months but that is long enough!
The ***** here have one favarourite place the co-op. Here they congregate trying to work out how the oldest one in the group (usually about 14-15) is going to get their supplies of **** and booze. They tend to ask people who are old enough to buy it for them, which when they are told no they come out with the usual insults of “ahhh mate yer a *****” and such like.
Another favourite hang out is the kebab house. As well as being a take-away they have seating available in there, where you are sure to find ***** seated but don’t actually buy anything. Plus, of course you have the little greaseballs on the fruit machines.
If you are a person who listens to heavy metal and dress accordingly you are well advised not to go out after 9pm, as the ***** here like anywhere are a nocturnal species. With their cans of cider they chant abuse, hurl eggs,hurl anything they can lay their bling ******** hands on. Like most occasions the insults are quite predictable and have been heard on many occasions. I think the word of the year is Greebo!
I was walking past the co-op the other day at about 11pm when some little **** said ” We don’t want greebos in our town” ( I on my part thought i don’t want to ******* be here don’t you worry) when he decided to punch me in the face! Not one to take this **** I smacked him back where he replied ” Im goona get my bruvs mate”. Typical.
However for the ****-spotters out there if you do visit this place ( be it at your own peril) be sure to visit the Barnham Inn. Guaranteed **** ***********. Fights every night so it doesnt matter what day you come down.
Well thats a description of Barnham a **** ******** hell hole.

Just one more thing myself and my friends might be “greebos” but at least we know who our fathers are.

How grim is your Postcode?

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