Royal Tunbridge Wells, elegant Regency town with the world famous Pantiles…………………..and home to an ever growing band of dirty ******* ******: More accurately, the High Brooms and Silverdale areas of Tunbridge Wells, as the cider drinking hoodie clad ***** couldn’t afford to live in TW town centre, plus there are no council houses in the centre of town.
The TW male **** can regulary be seen in the summer months ******* around the Victoria shopping centre, usually on a BMX with a *** behind each ear and shirtless (why do the ******** feel the need to go topless as soon as the sun comes out, particularly as they are always always skinny weedy little *****, but with a wanky attitude), in the Autumn/Winter/Spring months they are clad in the universal **** uniform of trackie bottoms, white trainers, hoodie, with hood up, and baseball cap.
The TW ******** is invariably fat with blond hair pulled high on to the top of their head, caked in Elizabeth Duke ***** and with a number of kids in tow – all of whom have different fathers, and there is usually a “braaaaahhhn” one included.
TW does not possess a Netto or Lidl (the nearest Lidl is in Tonbridge, four miles down the road and with even more ***** than TW), and therefore their shop of choice is Safeways, where the ****** ***** can be found wandering around the aisles talking in that volume that only ***** know – ******* loud.
They are all ******* horrible work shy ***** who think we owe them a living – although some do help themselves by thoughfully suing the council because they’ve tripped up whilst pissed on cider, and have been lured by the no win no fee adverts that are advertised on day time TV.
We should be allowed an annual amnesty day where we are allowed to go aroung kicking the **** out of the scuzzy ******** without fear of prosecution.
