Living in Prestwich
Written by Anonymous Visitor and posted in Greater Manchester, North West

Prestwich is a suburb around 4 miles North of central Manchester, and until 1974 was a unitary authority until being inexplicably absorbed into Bury with the formation of Greater Manchester.
It has been going downhill ever since.

Prestwich is filthy, the pavements are covered in dog turds and litter. It is so bad that at night people walk on the road to avoid stepping in it.

You could escape this with a bit of retail therapy, but Prestwich barely has any except charity shops. The centre of Prestwich is laughingly referred to as ‘The Village’, however as it mainly consists of metal shuttered kebab shops, and a shopping precinct so run down and ugly it would be have been rejected by town planners from the former Soviet Union, it is more like skid row, or hell, than ‘The Village’.

You may be saved however from looking at it by the horrendous levels of pollution which will make your eyes water so much that you won’t be able to see properly – probably resulting in you standing in some of the dog turds or some abandoned kebab/chippy/Chinese takeaway carton.
The pollution is caused by the amazing act of infrastructure planning that has an 8 lane motorway (M60- J17) exiting onto the single lane Bury New Road, a main artery into Central Manchester, this baffling stupidity is further enhanced by there being 5 sets of unsyncronised traffic lights within a quarter of a mile. This place is gridlocked and stinks. The pollution exceeds all government guidelines.

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If you want to escape the stink all is not lost. You can escape to Heaton Park. This is a once-wonderful 650 acre park now mostly ruined by endless summer concerts (great if you like concerts and don’t live here, bad if you do and don’t like pissheads peeing through your letterbox at midnight) and neglect. Heaton Hall should be wonderful, instead of one the English Heritage endangered list. The concerts were meant to bring in revenue and improve the park. They have brought in revenue but the park is more run down than before.

So you could instead go to the 2,000 acre Drinkwater/Phillip’s/Waterdale Park instead, but you’ll run over by some 15 year old kid on a stolen motorcross bike, and your own kids will end up with a dog phobia for life after some out of control dog flattens them after launching itself at them at 25 MPH unbeknownst to its owner who will be so whacked out on dope they won’t have noticed.

All is not lost, you can go to Central Manchester on the tram and marvel at the anti-social behaviour, the drunks and be glad to get off into civilsation – sadly though you have to come back again.

Prestwich is a great idea, some lovely houses, a good location, just ruined by bad management and too many people who don’t give a s**t.