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Langley Mill

This article has: 40 Comments

While I was at university, I believed I had escaped the horrible cluster of small East Midlands towns of my childhood forever. Not so. Sitting down to watch a documentary about neo-fascism in England, where should I find was the centre of this particularly unpleasant aspect of Chav existence, but Langley Mill? Langley Mill is in Derbyshire, very close to Eastwood, where I grew up, and is also highly chavvy. (See separate entry). It is also a missed opportunity. Economically, Langley Mill was dependent on the Railways, and when they went away, Langley Mill went into a terrible decline. Langley Mill became the originator of horrific chavdom which spread to the neighbouring mining towns when that industry also went the way of all flesh. Langley Mill has spread its race like a cancer throughout Nottinghamshire and Derbyshire. It is in the heart of Bandit Country. The sad thing is that it didn’t have to be this way. Langley Mill still has a station that can deliver one quickly to Nottingham and Sheffield, and directly to London in two hours. Economically it ought to have recovered. The canal has been made attractive by volunteers, and there are still large, potentially beautiful Victorian railway inns which could have made the place a lovely gateway to the Peak District. Instead, Langley Mill is a seething hell-hole of deprivation and drug abuse, the Railway Inn, the Mill and the Great Northern are for the Shazzers and Darrens to belt out Karaoke, when they are not being used by the local White Power groups to arrange lynch mobs for local Asian small business owners attempting to make a living. No-one with a vocabulary over 6,000 words or hair not coated in whale fat would consider entry. As for the canal? I think you all know what happened to that, don’t you? If I say pre-teen pregnancy and discarded needles, I am sure you can work out what the average rambler encounters their attempt to discover Britain’s industrial heritage.

I arranged my school sixth-form’s Hallowe’en party at the Mill, foolishly enough, as I knew it was the only pub that would allow those of us still under 18 to buy drink with impunity, as to my knowledge, English Law has not been enforced in Langley Mill since the Nineteenth Century. One has the sensation of being a pioneer in one of the goldrush towns of the Old West that are so glamourised in the nearby American Adventure theme park. This is possibly because, like the chavs, American Pioneers were illiterate, drunk, violent, and hell-bent on destroying the native civilisation they encounter wheresoever they go.

Having stepped off the train from London the other evening, I was beginning my walk home wondering how many of my possessions I would retain, when I discovered the latest, brightest, shiniest addition to Langley Mill, not having been there in some years. Where a factory used to be, and before that railway tracks, there was instead a large, brighly lit KFC, inviting passing trade from the nearby M1 to ‘stop for a family treat’. Former cabinet minister Kenneth Clarke was born in Langley Mill. I would love it if he came back there to see what has been allowed to happen to culture and society in Britain over the last six decades, perhaps to eat his first ever meal served in units of ‘pieces’ and ‘buckets’. Yum. Munch away, chavs, go on, guzzle it down, because we both know that there is absolutely nothing better to hope for. I hope it f**king kills you.

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  • Bucket basher 01

    I have lived in langley mill all my life and it’s a s**thole just like most other places in the uk…. But it’s working class to the core. We watched our parents struggle and when our time came we worked hard enough that we didn’t have to. I’v loved my upbringing here and done all the REBEL s**t that goes with it and I’m sat here today in my own house with all I need and I work for a respectable aerospace company……and I used to be one of those “chavs” this bitch keeps bangin on about. Tell you what mrs bucket… Never judge a book by its cover……..and take that stick out your arse!

  • Brian

    More chavs and arseholes at one university, than all of the area,born here,lived here nice people if you could only come down from that high horse.

  • community member

    What an unfortunate article. The writer obviously had a very unhappy upbringing in Eastwood, Nottingham. Langley Mill is actually in Derbyshire (although the Royal Mail insist on labelling us with a Nottingham post code.)
    I’m sure if the writer was to make a return visit to our village they would indeed feel a warm sense of community with people from all walks of life. As they commented, the rail line give’s easy access to London and many commuters take advantage of this. Along with the ease of motorway access we really are ideally situated for accessing Leicester, Sheffield, Birmingham etc.
    We have more fast food outlets and charity shops than any of us would like but this is typical of any area at the moment in the present economic climate but we balance that quite nicely with the lovely stores and independent shops and restaurants springing up around them.
    A village like ours doesn’t have to validate itself by its shops. Surely it should be about the people and the community they make.

  • Chav champ

    Ah, such an intelligent author, clearly it was a good university at which they studied. Personally I moved here from the more affluent south and I saw more ‘white powder’ usage down there in a week than I’ve seen here in 12 years. Clearly some of the follow up comments show a distaste for progress with new economic additions in the form of certain retail and fast food outlets, so really one is damned if you do by such comments and damned if you don’t by the author. Quite frankly, I now see Heanor as the poorer cousin to Langley Mill. Plenty of free parking in Langley Mill ensures the retail outlets both new and old are easily frequented, plenty of more affordable housing stock ensures its an easier place for teachers and nurses etc to have a home and very easy transport links by rail to Nottingham, Manchester and beyond, bus links to Derby and Nottingham. M1 5 miles away. Countryside on your doorstep, a community police officer, and a quick dash into the Peak District. Really, does the author now live in London….where possession is a sign of success, the air is thick with pollution, the police officers sit in armed vans in no less than three’s, you can’t afford a shed let alone a house, the nearest you get to countryside is a blade of grass on a rooftop garden and you haven’t a clue about your neighbours name!
    I think the author should pay us a visit but would rather they stay away as the area and I as a business owning lawyer can do without their brand of synicism and devaluation of the true values in life.

  • David smith

    Recently langleymill has seen a massive increase in retail, Asda, home bargains, McDonald’s and even more plans for retail, it really is a pleasant place to visit. I have always lived in Heanor and never used to visit but now I do all my shopping in Langley mill. On a Saturday the streets are full of shoppers, it really is starting to function well as a busy town centre again. Asda has everything you need, as well as post office, charity shop and opticians…. I could go on …but I really would recommend Langley mill for anyone for retail and food.

  • Roma Bothamley

    We have just read this article,albeit ancient news ! We suggest you revisit. Make time for Eggs Benedict and a machiato at Basilia, Langley Mill. Google it and take a tour of the deli-cafe-garden. Join the Basilia book club or get involved in the supper club.
    Also as our namesake flour mill is being demolished we look forward to the new Marina.
    The owner was born in Langley Mill(actually above the store) and has chosen to return,sinking life savings into this business. The people and customers about have been amazing..truly amazing the reaction to our opening last year superlative.!!
    So come down to Mill pick up your Parma Ham, little tallegio or a hand baked cake,

  • Dave

    having been born in Langley mill I do have fond memories of the place, i am still in contact with some of the natives of my era and the only thing that gets me down is the loss of all the things I knew as a kid, my past is being eroded by ‘progress’ but I have my memories, Heanor ‘Empire’ for one, ‘mole hill’ in Langley and Langley baths, all contribute to the person I am today, good or bad, chavs are not a Derbyshire desease, we have them in Grantham too! life is what you make it, we had less luxuries than most kids have today and we turned out alright, I am saddened when i pass through to see what’s changed. it was never fantastic when we were kids, but it was home…

  • Anon

    We have got an Asda now.

  • Deborah Allen

    What complete and utter rubbish. Having been born and brought up in Langley Mill, I can state categorically that it is a nice place to live and has no more “white power” influences than anywhere else. The T.V. programme referred to was rigged to produce exactly the end result the makers wanted. The producers rented the shop and staffed it with chosen individuals.There was no content shown which included local people welcoming the new shop keepers to the area. Of course it is suffering as a result of the present financial crisis as are lots of other small towns. Instead of bitching about somewhere like Langley Mill, get of your backside and be part of a positive solution as opposed to an irritating aspect of the areas’ problems.

  • ryyex

    Utter rubbish

  • Orianne Wightman

    I’ve lived in Langley Mill for 10 years now and you couldn’t of put it any better, my childhood was horrible within the this area and I was contsantly put down by the intense amount of illiterate chavs. Glad to be going to University and getting away from this hell hole! Great article!

  • Daniel Howard

    Rotter do you live in Langley Mill or in the local area? Because you do you seem to have some sort of mental health issue.