Written by Anonymous Visitor and posted in Lancashire, North West, United Kingdom

Have you ever wondered where you can go to escape the bleak normality of your day-to-day life? Ofcourse you have! Well, perhaps Fleetwood is the town for you. Forget posh restaurants (or perhaps just forget “posh” altogether)- instead,think KFC and McDonalds. Forget fashion- think baseball caps, Burberry and lots of bling! And ofcourse, forget the true,standard English. Who needs that when you have so much slang and swear words?

Fleetwood is a busy town, near the world-famous Blackpool, home to the Kiss me quick hats and the ever popular donkey rides on the beach. Fleetwood was stumbled on by a most intelligent traveller during the 15th century. He was known only by the name of “chavster King” and his wife, Sharon-Lousie always stayed close by his side, clutching a child in one arm and it’s older sibling in the other. After many years of map work and mad parites,the Chavster king named this mysterious place, Fleetwood- the name of his seventh grandchild. Chavster King died aged sixty two, safe in the knowledge that so many young teenagers would carry on the Fleetwood traditions- un-protected sex, drinking and smoking at at an illegal age and ofcourse, wearing the trademark fashions of Fleetwood.

Now you know the history of this marvellous town, you must hear the more modern tales of Fleetwood- although The Chavster King traditions are still going to this very day (but now they mostly happen all at the same time).
But people in Fleetwood are now choosing to spend more time caring for and getting to know each other. One incident I heard of was when a kind gentlemen actually stopped during sex and asked his younger girlfriend if he should use some form of contraception- and people complain about the youth of today! I now hear that he and his girlfriend are no longer together,but they do see each other every Satuarday moning when he comes to pick up young Shelby for the weekend- such a committed father.

So there you have it, a caring and traditional place- perfect for all the family (unless there are any teenage girls in the family, which is not recommended).