Ebbw Vale, what a town

Living in Ebbw Vale

Where should I start, Ebbw Vale is one of the **** capitols of the South Wales Valleys!!! For a town with a population of around 29000 there are only 3 pubs in the town centre and is subsequently a brewing pot for fights, and there are fights galore!!!!! Every neanderthal in the town just seems to want to fight, with anything and everything, from picking fights with bins to fighting with the boys in the local kebab shops. The weapon of choice is noy a knife of even a gun but it is the humble half-councie (arf cownsee) or half of a council brick thrown with all the precision of a blind person playing darts after a night out on the pop.

Then there is the Multi-story carpark, it looks like it has just been on an episode of “Pimp my Ride UK”, the already awful looking building has been recently revamped, they painted the building white and then covered the place with bright green fluorescent lights!!!!!! All it needs now is a set of spinners and some hydraulics!!!

There is not much of a drug problem though, because everybody is on something so nobody gives a s**t, you can get whatever takes your fancy. You can tell who is doing what around the town by looking at their houses, due to the lack of jobs the only way you can make a living is either:

How grim is your Postcode?
  1. Deal drugs
  2. Claim benefits
  3. Both

It seems like everyone has got a bad back around the town, the carpark in the local Tesco has even got extra disabled parking spaces for the “sick” and their nice new free cars.

Ebbw Vale has recently gained a brothel, nice.

All in all, Ebbw ain’t the worst place in the world, but it ain’t no paradise either.