Written by Anonymous Visitor and posted in Lancashire, North West, United Kingdom

Who could of thought such a small town could have so many many bastardized human being (chavs) in it. you can’t go out at night without one of the little bastards asking you for somr money so they can go buy some fags, usually L&B’s or some cider.These c***s usually hang outside henthorn paper shop/off liscense saying they will beat the s**t out of you and shag ur mum if you refuse.At night they seem to love going home smelling of take-away food. The f*****g scrotum faced bastards swarm around sue’s chippy,pizza tops, and the orient kebab house every night without fail hurling thier food at cars that pass buy. You would think the poor bastard would eat their only meal of the day but they don’t. this must be the reason why they are are skinny c***s. i have seen more meat on a butchers pencil fo f**k sake.

You have got to admire the chav dress code. Its genius…not! here are some of the most common items of the Clitheroe chav:

berburry baseball cap
addidas ‘trackies’
fake rockport shoes
fake gold chian
argos rings

The only good thing about chavs is they become drug dealers, go to prison, and come out with assholes twice as big as they were when they went in.


  • DT

    Im from Ireland and have lived in Clitheroe for almost 9 years and not once has anyone asked me for money for fags, told me they would shag my mum or have I seen anyone throw take away at a passing car. What a load of bollocks, there are much worse places to live in lancashire let alone the UK!

  • kungfumamma

    also i like how you have remained Anonymous, don’t let your one off personal experince cloud your sh*tty little judgement of the rest fo this town, you pathetic teenage junkie.

  • kungfumamma

    Let me start by saying who every wrote this is a utter c**k !! henthorn is one small area of clitheroe, don’t generalise the rest of it by posting such utter bullsh*t!

  • MAF

    Whilst I agree on the amount of chav d**kwads that hang around on that little sector of town I would dispute the fact that Clitheroe is a chav town. What a shallow view you must have had going to two of the most obvious places where d**kheads would hang out. Why don’t you do something more constructive with your life? Also why don’t you use a bit of spell check then you don’t sound like a f**king chav whilst you write your ever so informed views?

  • Who Ru

    Sort your life out

  • becky g

    hahahahaha !! that well made me laugh. !! xxxxx

Written by Anonymous Visitor and posted in Lancashire, North West, United Kingdom

This a beautiful market town in rural Lancashire, at least on the surface. By night time, it is a vile hotpot of in-breds, chavs and cretins all battling it out on the quaint streets.

The vilest hang outs are often those that think they’re posh. The Emporium is one of those. It’s a tasteless early 90’s refurb of a pub and attracts the new moneyed chavs. The owner is a p***y son of a computer salesman and has spent his father’s money vulgarly. It’s a hell hole full of designer geared chavs thinking they’re posh, but listen to their earthy vocabulary and talk of “mowtteers” and you seen realise the’yre utter scum. Only in Clitheroe (clitrow to give it it’s correct name) couls such a dump exist let alone survive.

Other pubs in the town are far more honestly chav – The Bridge will get you a good kicking if you’re found not to be on social – more p***y than chav. The dog used to be run by a fat chav c*nt, but his legacy still lingers on. Everybody ends up after a good night out in the Key hole (Key Street) – Clitheroe’s pathetic effort of a “night spot” or Whalley’s Rendezvous. Both are where wineos, chavs a, inbreds and cretins can eye each other up for a fight/shag. Simply horrible – my advice, stay at home at night and see what’s on telly.


  • toodles

    Clitheroe is a lovely town!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  • Roy

    Nevermind whats whrong with chavs. What is right with chavs.

    Extra burden on the social system. Extra burden on the police, courts, prisons, hospitals to name a few.

    Get a job and pay some taxes

  • Lanc

    A sh*thole with nice outskirts. The sh*t hole side is full of love to be gangsters, slappers, nieces shagging uncles and a mass of great unwashed.

  • happypeeps

    clitheroe is full of no mark wannabees and silly little slappers who think theyre it ie leanne bennett cross eyed skinny runt

  • nospmahretepleahcim

    to the comment of this moron we dnt steortype the old casue they have an excuse. And i have a suggestion to chavs donate your body to science so we know what humans were like 500,000 years ago and id glady tell u where i live cause i live in clitheroe so really i can take the “p*ss” out of it and you most likey wont reply. And another thing why are you even on this site posting a reply something that is showing the the truth of the chavside

  • Loco

    my god, what is the world coming to. “whats wrong with chavs?” LOL anyone that has to ask themselves that needs a serious slap in the balls.

  • vanessa115115

    screw you!!!!!!!! clitheroe is fine, plz do tell me where u liv so i can go take the p*ss outta ur home town u c**t. Yer so there r a few chavs but wtfs wrong with chavs??? im mostly p*ssed off coz u automatically sterotype everybody as a chav and theyre clearly not! i mean do u see grandpa walkin down the road with his nikes and his trews tucked into his socks…i think not u c**t. Go take the p*ss outta ur own town…o sorry u cant coz u live in a box u f**kin twat!

Written by Anonymous Visitor and posted in Lancashire, North West, United Kingdom

As they said in Godzilla, size does matter. But in Clitheroe, even though it’s so, well, microscopically small, size doesn’t matter. I wish the legendary Japanese monster (or monstaaaaa in townie-speak) himself would come and destroy some of the Chav-infected teenagers who hang around this otherwise (fairly) quiet, pleasant market town.

No night out in Clitheroe is complete without a smattering of scruffy, greasy-haired young reprobates trying to get served in “The Dog Music and Sports Bar” or rearranging the Tesco sign to say “PENIS POO” or something to that degree. Don’t cross them either – they don’t like staring! Also, one of them pushed me off a wall for no apparent reason once. I think there was a 10 ft drop – and I cracked my head.

I was once unfortunate to cross these people. They were crucifying a mate of mine for chatting up a 15-year-old and shouting “YOU PAEDOPHILE!” How old were we at the time? 16……… They also approached us outside the chavs’ favourite takeaway, “Romero’s”, saying they’d (no joke) “knock our blocks off…….” Hmm, last heard that phrase in roughly junior nursery class, I estimate!!!

A Friday night outside “The Dog” is a quality place to watch the Chavs kick the living Brad Pitt out of each other like a pack of hungry wolves. It makes A Clockwork Orange look like Bambi.

Fortunately, they usually don’t have a Chavette bird alongside them pushing a praam with a baby called Piranha or Fiesta. The local ladies may have questionable tastes sometimes (i.e. never going for me!) but they’ve got much better taste than that! Well, most of them…

They are very sexually frustrated, I feel sorry for the poor innocent local wildlife in this rural area. No wonder the farmers get f**ked off with them!

So, “WHERE ARE THEIR MUMS AND DADS?”, the question that’s usually asked when you see these
little shitbags up to no good.

If we’re to believe the local newspaper coverage, it looks like they’re usually at the local BNP rally.

And, all of them seem to be wearing an earring – remember the phrase: “There’s only two sorts of people who wear earrings – puffs an’ pirates – AND I DON’T SEE MANY SHIPS ROUND HERE!!!!!”

Top chav spotting locations:

Town centre
– The Queen Victoria (local name “The Vic”)
– The Dog
– Clitheroe Social Club
– Romero’s takeaway
– Benches outside the library
– Any supermarket open after dark, especially Sainsbury’s car park

Other parts of town
– Virtually everywhere. Ribblesdale High School, although full of many nice, decent people, is also their breeding ground!

Further afield
– Macdonald’s, going out of town on the A59 buspass – watch out for your fellow customers!


  • Ian Man

    Had the best time ever there for my 53 rd 🙂 , People are so friendly, all ages and the place should be proud of the fact it’s one of the cleanest places I’ve been too . Keystreet night club is one of a kind for the right reasons , fun loving /happy people knowing how to enjoy life without hurting anyone else. Best pubs going and live music second to none.

  • Daniel Yates

    Who ever wrote this I have to warn you …..if you think this about Clitheroe don’t ever EVER go the Burnley!! Your tiny mind will literally explode. x

  • Chris higgins

    Never experienced any of this having lived here 23 years. Clitheroe is relatively nice place to live, especially surrounding areas. I’m a Chatburn resident. I have to admit though, Clitheroe is somewhat of a dead-end town, especially for youth who i would recommend move away given the chance, for university for example, and stay away if they’d like to lead a ‘Real’ life, career perhaps, etc.

  • infected

    clitheroe is a proper dump full of idiots who have beef with you and want to fight,lots of slappers just desperate to get f##ked spreading stds like wildfire i f##ked a blond slag called gemma round the back of keystreet the other week now my d**k burns when i p*ss(not good)youve been warned

  • nospmahretepleahcim

    i have to agree. I have the unforunate luck to be living in this town so i have frequent encounters with the drooling class. I thank god that i have left ribblesdale school and go to a chav free 6th form (well there are chav like ppl but they are smart people and have respect for everyone) and looking at chav replys to this it took quite awhile to get of the floor from laughing.

  • vanessa115115

    hav u herd this f**kin w**ker mouthin off bout clitheroe…and hes actually got the nerve to slag off ribblesdale school. i still attend that school and i aint a f**kin chav, im so f**kin insulted by u. Ur such a c**t sayin all this sh*t then expectin us to take it. if ur so proud of ur own city go back to and tell every1 how much of a c**t u r

  • vanessa115115

    ur so f**kin rite dannyh hav u herd this f**kin w**ker mouthin off bout clitheroe…and hes actually got the nerve to slag off ribblesdale school. i still attend that school and i aint a f**kin chav, im so f**kin insulted by u. Ur such a c**t sayin all this sh*t then expectin us to take it.